When have you experienced vicarious trauma or when have you experienced your nervous system activating in response to the activation of another nervous system’s activation? What were the symptoms? How did you know it was happening? What support did you seek out?

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How to make vicarious trauma less contagious and break the rippling habits fear creates? 

Years ago my supervisor at a mental health organization reprimanded me for not spending time with the other therapists in the break areas. I remember bluntly telling her that I wanted to spend time connecting with the other therapists, but there was too much vicarious trauma. She quickly retorted, saying the organization does regular vicarious trauma trainings. 

The organization did have mandatory vicarious trauma trainings, but they were not enough.  All of the therapists worked with families with children under 18, who were struggling with overlapping interpersonal trauma, community trauma and immigration trauma. It was too much trauma for one therapist and their supervisor to hold without becoming vicariously traumatized. Vicarious trauma is tricky it spreads through every crack in systems, relationships and individuals. We all needed many more layers of support. 

I asked if we could build the layers of support that worked in other organizations I’d been part of to dissipate the effects of vicarious trauma, but they declined. This mental health organization had an old school hierarchical model and because I was new - they did not want any suggestions on shifting the way they managed vicarious trauma.  Unfortunately, if ignored - vicarious trauma spreads more easily and devastatingly, spinning the whole organization into survival mode.

What my supervisor didn’t know is that I had spent many years creating programs and trainings that supported anyone and everyone to navigate the vicarious trauma inherent with working with children and adults who had experienced abuse and violence, with crisis hotlines, with substance abuse as well as often connected with work with houseless youth and adults, and with foster youth. There was a rape crisis hotline I stayed with for 10 years as a volunteer, becasue we managed vicarious trauma so well. In my experience volunteers were getting better support and training than professional therapists because of the willingness to acknowledge the impacts of vicarious trauma. 

The unwillingness to acknowledge the ripple effects of vicarious trauma and build systems that truly mitigated against it  in mental health organizations caused me to break away to start an organization that could.  I was determined to build an organization that could be a model for organizations on how to dissipate the impacts of trauma and vicarious  trauma by the way it was designed like I had seen done successfully through some volunteer programs.

Building a model that disrupts the spreading of vicarious trauma…

Since vicarious Trauma is contagious, and spreads just like the flu. It means someone gets exposed to a traumatic story. The story lives in them. Makes their body feel that the world is more unsafe. Every time the story is retold the vicarious trauma spreads. One nervous system tells another nervous system to be on high alert. To activate. And, then that body brings that fear everywhere it goes - at home exposing partners, children and loved ones without even having to share the story. When the story has seeped into the cracks of us enough, we know because it has changed our mood, made us irritable, or anxious or numb, or depressed or ashamed or hopeless and our family soaks this up through us.  Just like when we are exposed to the flu - we need various layers of protection and ways of navigating infection on an individual and collective level in order to truly contain it. Unfortunately, few organizations or businesses prioritize this multi-layered type of buffer for their practitioners or participants, they simply make it an issue an individual needs to address themself. 

In the current landscape of rampant fear and uncertainty for providers working with individuals experiencing trauma - new type of organizational structure is more important than ever. We need to draw from more success stories on how to build an organization with a structure that inherently dismantles vicarious trauma. This isn’t a pipe dream. We did it with the organization Hatch Community, serving individuals and families with significant trauma and using structures to effectively weave “trauma informed” into the fabric of an organization. This model is nothing like you have experienced in other trainings with vicarious trauma. It creates structures of sustainability for the work by buffering the employees, instead of making it their issue to navigate alone. The structure tends to the business nervous system in order to subsequently care for every individual, their family/chosen family and anyone they could expose. The reason this works is our nervous systems can alert one another to safety as much as to danger, we just have to create environments that break the habits of fear and vicarious trauma from spreading to make this a possibility.

Where to start?

For you…

1. Identify symptoms of an activated nervous system…(The symptoms for trauma and vicarious trauma overlap) - Don’t pretend you are okay or can handle it. 

   1. Emotional: anxiety, depression, anger, and numbness 

   2. Physical symptoms: sleep disturbances, panic attacks, and chronic pain

   3. Behavioral changes: social withdrawal, irritability, hypervigilance, and substance abuse

   4. Cognitive symptoms: difficulty concentrating, loss of interest in previously enjoyed activities, and a distorted sense of meaning

2. Track your nervous system activity and prioritize its health and agility: Take breaks. Make Space in your schedule. Not everyone has the luxury of not living in survival mode. If you do, choose to. It will support everyone around you. 

3. Consistent Self-care, daily rituals not a one-off event. 

4. Reach out for support - I can help you learn how to do the work you care deeply about without taking on all the trauma. 

For your family and chosen family…

1. Get really honest with yourself and identify how others are being impacted by your vicarious trauma. 

2. Separate your work and your home life. Completely. This is the equivalent of don’t expose them to the flu. 

3. Pause between work and family interactions: Take a shower. Take a walk. Pause at the door of your house or home office room - every time you walk through it and leave everything on the other side of the door, protecting your partner, your kids, your loved ones or your roommates from exposure. 

4. Reach out for support - I can help you to learn how to not take trauma home to your family. It’s not worth the cost to any of you.  

For your work…

1. Have the hard conversations with supervisors or develop a team to build in new structures and systems that better support you and by design dissipate vicarious trauma. 

2. Identify small steps that can be taken immediately to acknowledge that vicarious trauma is an issue. Then, begin to identify steps for change. 

3. Reach out - I can help create an innovative and individualized approach for your business, organization or program to both identify where vicarious trauma is showing up and how to address it. 

The current political climate has demanded that we amplify the support for ALL organizations, especially those on the frontline. The heightened degree of vicarious trauma demands NEW levels of systemic, relational and individual support structured within organizations, even more so for organizations who are advocating for populations directly targeted by the current administration. We can’t do this alone. We have to do it together. Connect 

Read more of my writing on my blog…

OFFERINGS

Connect with me for Coaching or Mediation: My intention is to help you build structures that support nervous system agility and exquisite (higher volume) care for yourself, your family, your business and your communities in challenging times of uncertainty, big divisions and fear through finding new options and pathways for outdated patterns and past traumas towards more resilience, joy and even playfulness. I offer Family System Coaching Packages for 7, 14 and 21 sessions. I offer individuals an introductory 5 session package as well as 4 sessions a month for a minimum of 6 months. My business and non-profit consulting is customized to the needs of the organization. For a 20 minute free consultation: Connect

Developing Peer Mentorship Training Programs in your Org or Business: if your interested in building a training program in your non-profit or business, reach out. I provide the infrastructure and training to efficiently build a program around the skill you want to teach participants or employees, while incorporating how we care for ourselves and care for one another, through conflict and repair, allowing for more sustainable systems and the outcome you want in your org or business.

CHANGES in my work…

Moving forward I will be offering more group opportunities with more limited availability for one on one work. If you are curious about group work, have never done it, and feel like you need more information to feel open to it…please reach out for a chat.

I am really excited about some new groups….Reach out if you are interested in learning more…

Fight Better - Conflict Resolution Group: Learn individual strategies to regulate your nervous system and co-regulate. You will also learn interpersonal relational and mediation skills, you can apply to conflict resolutions in all your relationships. Connect 

Co-Parenting Group - This group is for parents, step parents or aunties/uncles/grandparents/fairy god parents who are collaborating in parenting and raising children. You will learn strategies for conflict resolution and how to create effective co-parenting structures that support everyone, especially children. It takes a village, this is how you create one. Connect 

Kids Co-Regulation Groups (in person): Small groups of tweens (9-12) and  teens (13-16) using activities to build social skills, confidence and full range emotional literacy. Reach out if you want to get your kid involved. (Groups are created on an on-going basis, must be at least 3 participants to start a group, times vary based schedule availability of participants.) C

ADDITIONAL GROUPS AND OFFERINGS:

Family Coaching Drop-in Group: Parenting with Support - Wednesdays at 12pm PST. Join any Wednesday, just reach out for zoom link!  

My dream is to disrupt the isolation in parenting and prioritize thriving family nervous systems, transforming generations through support and intentional community.  This group invites parents into a container of support to have the opportunity to parent together. All with the vision that more webs of communities and connections will grow from there.  Please reach out if you are interested in joining the parenting group and please share the opportunity with parent’s who you think might be interested!

Social Entrepreneur Networking Group - Mondays at 8am PT, join any Monday.

Join a growing community of entrepreneurs from underrepresented or underestimated communities who are dedicated to giving back to their communities. We meet monthly to network, collaborate and dream up the world we want to co-create. Connect

Finding Hope in Times of Despair Writing Group : Moving Beyond Survival towards …Together building a new world for ourselves and the next generations Fridays at 8am PT, Join any Friday, just reach out for zoom link!  

Join a writing group that focuses on curiosity with prompts, sharing and community support around how we can all better support our nervous systems through inevitable change to build the world we want for ourselves and the generations to come. The group’s intention is to find hope in despair as well as agency in knowing when to stretch to take risks, and when to slow down and nurture - better caring for ourselves, others and the world. Connect

Add Climbing Coaching and Boxing Coaching

Add indoor or outdoor climbing or boxing to your coaching package to embody your or your child’s shifts in a new way. Reach out if you are interested!

Check out climbing website: www.katwhippleclimbing.com

If you are CURIOUS about my offerings…connect with me for a 20 minute chat.